A Maths Test ... AND an F.A. Investigation

East Thurrock United F.C. vs. Enfield Town F.C. 
Ryman League Premier Division

Saturday 18th April, 2015 – 3pm kick-off

Venue: Rookery Hill, Corringham, Essex SS17 9LB

It's match day! The final match day of the regular season. I write this on Saturday morning (the 25th). Last week we covered part of the alphabet. This week we'll be doing some remedial maths. You can probably sense that we're heading towards exam revision season ... or the tail end of the football season. Some readers may already be aware of the recent administrative trail of events that has embroiled the club; and we'll visit the details of this later; but first, let us catch up with all the news that's fit to print about last weekend's all-important game, down on the glorious, sunny Thames Riviera. I have to admit this match report is somewhat more delayed (again) than I would have liked; but, then again, that's given me the chance to include news of Enfield Town's FA investigation "scandal". First up, though, it's last week's penultimate game of the season; with play-off hopes hanging in the balance.

   

Corringham: if that name conjures up 'seasons of mellow fruitfulness' for any readers, you've obviously never been there. It is thought to originate from the name of a Saxon chieftain named Curra. The ‘ing’, refers to his followers, and ‘ham’ means his ‘home’. The parish church's name (St. Mary the Virgin) prompts plenty of nudges, winks and inappropriate jokes about the chastity of the local women-folk and of Essex Girls in general. On a more cultured note, however, according to Wiki, the south wall of the church contains examples of Saxon herringbone stonework in both the nave and the chancel; and there are other Saxon features inside the church. The tower is also likely to be Saxon. A perfect setting, perhaps, for Enfield to come marauding, then; in the hope of pillaging the place - and looting three more points towards their hopes of an end-of-season play-off berth.

Before kick-off, there was one Rocks player for whom Enfield knew they definitely need to watch out. That was Thurrock's CF, #9 Sam Higgins With 32 goals already, he went into the game as the Ryman Premier League's top scorer by far. With exactly TWICE the total of Enfield's own best sharp-shooter, Corey Whitely.

   

Local views: the parish church of St. Mary the Virgin retains vestiges of its Saxon origins; DP World London Gateway Port does NOT.

A crowd of 344 was well ahead of The Rocks average, so far this season (216). Even so this number, swelled as it was by a large contingent of "Enfield Boys - Making ALL the Noise", as their singing soon reminded the locals, formed only the 6th-largest gate of the day in the Ryman Premier League. "Whaaaat's - It Like - to See - A Crowd?" they asked, to the melody of "Bread of Heaven". A party atmosphere prevailed in the away end to accompany the warm afternoon sunshine, as the visitors started the game kicking towards the Northern end of the Rookery Hill ground. A "boisterous" away crowd, fuelled by something more than the fine weather, were, indeed, making ALL the noise. A round trip of just over 70 miles, coupled with good weather and a crack at the play-off places had proved conducive to a strong turn-out; and all the club's familiar faces were there in the bright, Spring daylight.

Enfield's loyal following. "On the Road" in a way Jack Kerouac would probably NOT have recognised: flags, drums, beers and all.


In the early exchanges, Enfield's 'keeper, Nathan McDonald, was by far the busier of the two guardians. In a sustained period of early Thurrock pressure, he made a string of excellent saves, blocks and gathers. His best effort was a low, stretching save in the 2nd minute to thwart an early and dangerous-looking Thurrock break, ending in a fine shot from Lewis Smith. After these early concerns, Enfield settled into their stride and started to impose some control on the game; finally looking the better side and building their dominance of both territory and possession. The pitch was not good, even 'for this level'. Bobbles and unexpected bounces abounded; frustrating players and fans alike.
 
Top: Town's #10, Bobby Devyne lines up a shot that will be saved well by Thurrock's increasingly under-pressure David Hughes. Bottom: Hughes gathers gratefully (and awkwardly!) yet again!



In the 36th minute, against the run of play, the home side attacked from the right. A dangerous ball across Enfield's goalmouth evaded all. Just a few minutes later Thurrock proved their potency on the break. McDonald produced a fine snap-save from a well-worked cross and downward header. From the ensuing scramble, the ball somehow ended up in the Enfield net; but, to sighs of Enfield gratitude, the goal was disallowed. "You - Thought - You had scored ... So did we - so did wee-ee!" The relief was palpable. McDonald had to move early in the 41st minute, to smother another Thurrock attack on the edge of his area. By the end of the first half, it was 2-1 ... in the yellow cards count, to The Rocks. They were lucky to have collected so few: "Same - Old Ess-Ex; All-Ways Chee-ting!". The referee allowed just one extra minute, despite these - and many other - stoppages.

Enfield attack down their right, in front of elegant Saxon portacabins.

The salubrious surroundings of Saxon Stanford-le-Hope provided no public address system and, therefore, no half-time music. A blessed relief for some. Feverish checks on 'phones amongst the away fans reassured them that half-time scores elsewhere meant things were not (yet!) going against them. Town remained in a play-off place; but would desperately seek an opener.


The second half saw a change of ends and, eventually, a change of fortunes. Just three minutes into the half, Enfield #7 Livings played through #11 Campbell; but his effort flew low, wide and left, across from right of goal. Brad Quinton had done his talking in the changing room; and his players were going all-out. Town's pressure in attack was relentless. After 50 minutes Enfield finally had the ball in the net. Town's #5, Joe Ellul headed in a Livings corner; followed by Town fans' groans, again. This time it was Enfield who were incredulous, as the referee refused to allow the scoreboard to tick over from its stubborn initial position, showing 0-0. There was a supposed foul on the home 'keeper; but no-one wearing Enfield glasses had seen it, of course. The referee earned no more Enfield friends when he missed the most glaring of Thurrock handballs in the next minute. The bobbly surface was bad enough; but now a number of Enfield players started slipping over on the surface. Perhaps they had opted for small studs on a fine, dry day; but the result was a number of breakdowns in attack and worries at the back.

A Jordan Lockie snap shot from the edge of Thurrock's area went across goal from the left, with power after 53 minutes; and away fans must have been starting to wonder if there would be any goals in this game. In the 57th minute, Devyne crossed, Hughes flapped at the ball and it fell invitingly for ... absolutely nobody!. The hosts were riding their luck; largely penned back into their own half. Soon after, Devyne headed over, under pressure from Hughes. Campbell was obstructed in a dangerous position; but the set-piece chance was wasted by Whitely. There followed even more intense Enfield pressure, as they searched for that all-important opening goal. One rare attack at the other end saw a Thurrock free-kick struck firmly into the defensive wall. Rocks substitute Bryant collected the loose ball, before diving theatrically to ground, leading to an inevitable yellow card for 'simulation'. After 72 minutes Whitely's dangerous pass was turned goal-wards by Bobby Devyne, and Rocks #3 Tom Stephen got the final touch off his knee and past the despairing touch of goalkeeper Hughes. No referee intervention saves Thurrock this time: 0-1.
Celebrations at last! The relief is clear.

Five minutes later Hughes had to be on his mettle and 'out early' to smother another effort from Whitely, as Enfield continued to apply most of the pressure. Brad Quinton kept up a constant chorus of advice and support from the touchline near his dug-out: "Right foot; right foot ...when we ain't got the ball, get yourself inside and make a three, like this (hand gesture) ...Hooks; hooks - good boy!" But it wouldn't be a typical Enfield Town performance without some heart in mouth moments, would it?
 It's a lonely place, being a non-league club manager.

So, despite all Brad's helpful(?) coaching, Town gave the ball away sloppily in the 80th minute, at the back. David Bryant scampered gratefully clear with the ball, into the Enfield box, where Ricky Gabriel had no option but to haul him down in the box. A penalty; but, fortunately, the referee "bottled it" on the obvious last-player red card conclusion to the affair. The league's top scorer duly stepped forward, placed the ball carefully and then struck it right-footed (and even MORE carefully) in off the right-hand upright. A perfectly struck goal, resulting in an imperfect scoreline for Enfield fans: 1-1; but there was even worse to come.

Sam Higgins (partly obscured in centre) sends McDonald the wrong way and the ball in off the post to level the scores. A 'perfect' penalty kick!

Having already 'taken one for the team', in the 86th minute Gabriel,picked up a second yellow card for what the Town website would later describe as "a relatively innocuous contact with Witherspoon ... one of many inconsistent decisions by referee Hillier," Ain't that the truth?! No change from the norm. In those last few, dangerous minutes, Thurrock exploited the extra space created by their 'extra' man; but Enfield held firm for the final whistle and a point. A quick dash for the 'phones showed that one point was enough. Or was it ... ?

Space on the touchline late-on, as Thurrock play fast and loose with Town fans' heart-strings.

Given this and other results, we move on to the interesting maths:
Enfield sit in 5th place; the final play-off spot. One point and one place behind them, with a +8 superior goal difference are the Metropolitan Police. Two points and two places behind them (with a -1 inferior GD) lie Grays Athletic. Everything lies in Town's own hands, heading into the final day of the regular season. A win (against already-relegated Wtham Town) puts them into the play-offs. Even a draw MIGHT be enough; but that's unlikely, since Met Police host already-relegated Hornchurch. Grays need an away win at (correction from earlier details)) mid-table Kingstonian PLUS a(n unlikely?) defeat for Enfield and no more than a point for Met Police. There is little to choose between the three hopeful sides, in terms of recent form.

Assuming Enfield were successful, they face another test of their maths; as four teams head into the play-offs, each with a theoretical 4-1 chance of securing promotion. Although Town have the second-best recent form record, narrowly behind Hendon. Come On, You Towners!

And that, as they say, might have been that; but for some shock news from Football Association Towers. In a statement released yesterday on the club's home page they dropped the following bombshell:

"The Club and its player Aryan Tajbakhsh have been charged by the FA for playing 2 games whilst ineligible through suspension. The charges arise from games initially played by Aryan on his joining the Club. The Club through its own due diligence identified that Aryan’s former Clubs had not correctly reported his personal details when informing the FA of bookings incurred.  The Club immediately informed the FA in January 2015 of the discrepancies and were told to not play the player in the next 2 matches and followed that advice. The Club were also informed that no further action would be taken against it... also notified by the FA to the Ryman League on 17th February 2015.

It was therefore disappointing to hear on Monday that the Club had been summoned to a hearing on Wednesday concerning the offence of playing the player whilst ineligible. Despite the late notice officers of the Club attended the hearing.

Despite the FA recognising:
The Club (its officials and manager), had acted properly in carrying out the necessary checks;
It had identified and highlighted the issue to the FA immediately;
That the FA's own inadequate record system had led to this situation arising;
The decision of the Panel was to find both Club and Player guilty. There was no other penalty or costs awarded against the Club. The ramifications of this decision are yet to be decided. However it is likely under the Ryman League rules we will be deducted 3 points".

The maths has all, suddenly, changed. Off come the shoe and socks. I am writing up this piece on Saturday morning (25/4) ahead of Town's final game of the 'regular' season. There is a drizzle of gentle rain moistening the streets, pavements and sports fields of Enfield. I can only hope that comes as a gentle reminder to the FA panel who will, ultimately, decide the fate of The Towners' season from their Court of Justice:

"The quality of mercy is not strain'd,
It droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven
Upon the place beneath: it is twice blest;
It blesseth him that gives and him that takes"

Portia's speech in Shakespeare's The Merchant of Venice. 
Act IV, Scene 1; set in a Venetian Court of Justice.

... failing which, there WILL be an appeal by the club!

East Thurrock United: David Hughes, Ryan Sammons (Simon Peddie 73), Tom Stephen, Ben Wood, Paul Goodacre, Nicky Symons, Mitchell Gilbey (David Bryant 65), Connor Witherspoon , Sam Higgins, Kye Ruel (Ellis Brown 80), 11 Lewis Smith. Booked: Witherspoon, Gilbey, Ruel. Unused subs: Joe Paxman, Ellis Brown.

Enfield Town: Nathan McDonald, Jordan Lockie, Ricky Gabriel, Claudiu Vilcu, Joe Ellul, Stanley Muguo, Nathan Livings, Ryan Doyle (Dernell Wynter 70), Corey Whitely, Bobby Devyne (Michael Kalu 86), Tyler Campbell. Liam Hope, Phil Kane. Booked: Livings, Gabriel. Sent off: Gabriel.

Attendance: 344.