Easter: Enfield Play-Off Hopes "Resurrected"? ... the eagerly-anticipated match report

Enfield Town versus Bognor Regis Town F.C.

Ryman League Premier Division

Saturday 4th April, 2015 – 3pm kick-off

So, after this morning's eloquent preamble (elsewhere on this page) what of the big game itself? At lunchtime in the 'other' Premier League, Arsenal blew away Gerrard-less Liverpool like so much waste paper, to take second place and consolidate their grip on a top 5 finish. At 3pm Enfield Town lined up hoping to do something similar, against fellow play-off hopefuls, Bognor, in the rather more interesting Ryman Premier League - where teams all the way down to 14th place could still potentially harbour reasonable (if, in some cases, remote) hopes of a play-off place.

A glance at the team sheets in North London's later, bigger show-down revealed that both sides were now surprisingly different from those that had started the equivalent fixture a year ago. It is a sign of how much churn and how little consistency there is in playing squads, even 'at this level'. Only four of Enfield's starters in the previous fixture and three from Bognor made their respective starting line-ups this time. There was also a change to the referee originally named in the programme, too; as Adam Crysell stepped up for his brief moment of fame ... or would it be one of infamy!

The psyche of the football fan is little-studied by the academic world; but it is surely a simple statement of fact to observe that a largely-unchallenged optimism is something of a requirement; and a strong personality trait evident in many of us, for most of the season. I myself was confident right up until February, for instance, that Fulham would yet recover and make the Championship play-offs, with a late run of consistent strong form. No, really! With five league games remaining, it's fair to say that Enfield's end-of-season fate rests primarily in their own hands. If they were to win all five, The Towners would definitely be in the play-offs; but so what to that?! Following a hypothetical, successful attainment of a play-off place, there would still be only a 4-1 chance of gaining that coveted second promotion spot. Something today's visitors, Bognor, found out to their own cost just 11 months ago. Equally as important as securing a top-five place, surely, is maintaining the strong run of form that would be required for Enfield to grab one of those coveted top five positions. Here, perhaps, is where the apparent optimism of Enfield's fans has some logical basis; some tiny grounding in facts, rather than mere hope (and certainly very little grounding in Liam Hope, the club's record top goal scorer, whose star appears to have waned; and who would, again, start today's game from the bench).

Something else that will be admitted readily by most is that football fans are also a superstitious bunch. I would point you, specifically, to the sugar mouse ritual in Nick Hornby's "Fever Pitch" (1998) for evidence of that: "What happened was, Chris Roberts bought a sugar mouse from Jack Reynolds ('The Rock King'), bit its head off, dropped it in the Newmarket Road before he could get started on the body, and it got run over by a car. And that afternoon Cambridge United, who had hitherto been finding life difficult in the Second Division (two wins all season, one home, one away), beat Orient 3-1, and a ritual was born. Before each home game we all of us trooped into the sweet shop, purchased our mice, walked outside, bit the head off as though we were removing the pin from a grenade, and tossed the torsos under the wheels of oncoming cars; Jack Reynolds would stand in the doorway watching us, shaking his head sorrowfully. United, thus protected, remained unbeaten at the Abbey for months". It is with such a superstitious cast of mind that I contemplated my planned trip to Enfield Town's QEII stadium this afternoon. Having stayed away since that last home defeat to Leiston (which secured for them the dreaded 'double' over us) I have, from a distance, seen The Towners launch an unlikely but determined assault on the play-off places. Surely my DIY-enforced absence had been the key to their renewed success. If I were to stay away, would that, then, secure a continuation in their winning streak? If I were to go along, would I run the risk of derailing their heroic late-season efforts? There are more questions than answers. OK, so there had been a blip (the mid-week, away defeat at Lewes) in amongst that series of wins; but you'll have to cut me some superstition slack here. Should I selfishly bite the bullet? Or, indeed, the sugar mouse?

The farmer's wife had only got to one of these little sweeties.

A confidence-boosting look at the Ryman Premier League table revealed grounds for optimism in North London. Only one of the teams above Enfield (title-chasing Hendon, who may well have timed their late run of form to perfection) and only one of the teams below us (recovering former relegation "certainties", 19th-placed Harrow Borough) had a better, recent, five-game form record (visit

http://www.enfieldtownfootballclub.co.uk/s/table-65370.html for further details).

Reviewing the team sheets, an eagle-eyed spectator would have noticed that Bognor boasted a Trinidad & Tobago full international, in the shape of their #8, Jake Thomson. He has also represented England at Under-17 level and began his career at Southampton, playing a dozen matches in the Championship before moving on to play for Exeter City, Torquay Utd., Bournemouth, Cheltenham Town and others, Few visitors to Donkey Lane can claim, like Thomson, to have played in a World Cup qualifying match. How the mighty have fallen!

The weather was dry but dull; mild but breezy. First half action commenced with Enfield showing their attacking intent, playing towards the New River end. Wave after wave of forward pressure hemmed the Sussex side in; and set the tone for much of what was to follow. Enfield pressurising the visitors, whilst trying to maintain their defensive concentration, to cover any swift, counter-attacking breaks. That Enfield pressure was lifted, though only briefly, after a couple of minutes of play; when an announcement over the ground's public address system asked the owner of a mislaid Visa card to make themselves known. Home fans responded with a resounding, if light-hearted, chorus of "We want your PIN num-ber", repeated over to the melody of Verdi's "La Donna è Mobile", from "Rigoletto" (1851). We are cultured fans, you see, on the A10; but some may not have appreciated the full irony of that choice of source material; wherein there is, surely, a coded warning from the Duke of Mantua to fans of The Beautiful Game to be wary of the fickle fingers of football fate:

Always miserable

is he who trusts her,

he who confides in her

his unwary heart!

A poster for English National Opera's 2009 revival of Jonathan Miller's Hopper-inspired staging of "Rigoletto": beware the fickle fingers of football fate!

The Rocks' goal keeper, Chris Winterton, wore a fetching red jersey. It was all the more striking for bearing no number on its back. We hoped he'd soon be "fetching" the ball out of the back of his net wearing it. And soon, a variation on the home fans' usual hilarious, gentle goalie-mocking song ensued: "He's got no I-Q...". 

No number; and, apparently, "No IQ"? Bognor's Winterton watches on, front left in red, as Enfield launch yet another first-half attack.

The game was being played largely in the visitors' half of the pitch. Bognor were being outplayed; and their fans were being outsung: "Everywhere we Go, it's the Towner Boys, making all the Noise ...". After twelve minutes, Enfield's advancing right-back, Jordan Lockie, went down awkwardly after crossing a ball in from the right. He stayed down for some time and required treatment. He would later be substituted, at half-time. Miscued crosses, wasted free kicks, mazy runs with no end product, the ball bobbling off an uneven surface, dubious offside decisions, plenty of 'agricultural' defensive challenges AND some well-organised stalwart defending from the sea-siders all combined to ensure that attack after Enfield attack petered out harmlessly into nothing. The referee remained content to give those guilty of foul play "a stiff talking to". Epic fail! Admittedly, Bognor's centre-back pairing of Field and (skipper) Robson, looked very sound. By contrast, their right-back (the superbly-named #2, Snorre Nilsen - a Norwegian national and former apprentice at Portsmouth FC) seemed to lack both pace and finesse; despite a sharp haircut and his looking for all the world like a member of The '80's Vinyl Vikings, A-ha.

Despite all their pressure, Enfield required a great stop after 22 minutes, low to his right, by 'keeper Nathan McDonald, from a swerving, left-footed drive by Bognor's diminutive #4, Doug Tuck, from about 25 yards out. It was a timely reminder that there were two teams in the contest; but another strong reminder would be required, six minutes later, The Rocks' left-back, James Crane, found himself in far too much space on the left (and left alone!) as an attack on the right broke down and the ball found its way fortuitously to him. Too late, the injured Lockie spotted the danger and tried to close him down. Crane's cross found centre-forward Jason Prior, whose towering header, under pressure from Enfield #4, Claudiu Vilcu, went narrowly over McDonald's bar. It was a rare threat in a half dominated by the home side; but Enfield fans have seen too much pressure and possession come to naught, in too many matches this season to feel overly-confident. So nerves were left jangling on the occasion of those rare Bognor breaks. In the 35th minute, another cross (this time from the right, after some good work, again in too much space) from the otherwise-unproductive Nilsen, saw another good headed chance go over. Town were riding their luck. That didn't stop the home fans repeatedly singing the praises of manager Bradley Quinton - and demanding he wave at them.

Brad Quinton (in beige trousers!) prepares to wave to his adoring public.

Despite the lengthy pause in play for Lockie's injury, the stand-in referee allowed just 56 seconds of additional time before sending the two teams off to the changing rooms for their half-time cuppa with the scores surprisingly still at 0-0.

Spot The Difference: Home crowd; Away crowd.

During the break, the crowd attendance was announced as 533 - the third highest gate of the day in the league. This was well above Enfield's average for the season; and reflected both the Bank Holiday weekend timing of the game AND the above-average size of the visiting side's travelling support. Bognor are, after all, one of only 6 sides in the league with a higher average home gate than Enfield's - if only marginally so. Not only were Town winning the battle for possession and territory on the pitch, however; but their fans were also enjoying total singing domination over the visitors: "We - For-got that You were Here" - to the tune of "Bread of Heaven".

Bognor showed a change of attitude immediately after the break, relinquishing their spoiling style and going full out to catch their hosts with early pressure of their own. An early jinking run and blocked shot (by Town's #5, Joe Ellul) from their #4, Tuck, seemed to signal renewed cause for concern amongst the home fans. Tuck, incidentally, is the nephew of former Brighton left-back Stuart Tuck; and was previously on the the Seagulls' staff, himself. After that early scare, though, the pattern of play of the first half resumed. After a break-down in an Enfield counter-attack, following a heavy touch from #8 Ryan Doyle, who was returning to the side after a few weeks out, Devyne made a teasing run down the left-hand edge of Bognor's penalty area. The skillful #10 finally cut the ball back to Corey Whiteley. His diving header, from the edge of the 6-yard box, went under Winterton and into the net for the opening goal.

Cue a mass release of nervous tension from the home crowd and an increase in the volume of their singing - if that were possible. "Dulwich, Dulwich you are next. Dulwich - you are next!". Confidence soared immediately, despite the need to survive the remaining 43 minutes, plus stoppage time.

Photo: Ken Brazier.    Whiteley stoops to head Enfield in front, as sleepy Snorre lives up to his name. 

Bognor immediately responded by replacing their ineffective Norwegian right-back ("Everybody's Talkin' at Me...") bringing on #17, Daryl Wollers. Knowing their play-off hopes were receding fast, they appeared to switch from a 'flat' back-four to a system deploying three centre-backs, in order to put more pressure on Enfield's previously dominant midfield. There was suddenly more balance to possession and pressure in the game; and Enfield nerves may have jangled just a little more than before. In the 56th minute, however, Doyle made a determined run down Enfield's right to retrieve a seemingly over-hit ball, culminating in delivery of a low cross for the advancing Whitely.

This time, The Towners' #9 appeared to fluff his lines, having his effort blocked on the edge of the Bognor 6-yard box. The ball fell kindly for him, though; and he struck a second effort from the fortuitous rebound, low from the centre of the Rocks' area, beating their 'keeper to double Enfield's lead. Bognor now had just 34 minutes left to try and save their season; and, accordingly, they stepped up their efforts in attack. "We're going up; we're going up; you're not; you're not!", sang the elated Towners' fans. It was wishful and still-premature, if joyously exuberant, thinking.

Completely gratuitous corner flag 'porn', from the 2nd half. Enfield attack, again!

After 58 minutes, Devyne fed Whitely, whose curling shot from the centre went just wide to the right of goal. His hat-trick would have to stay 'on hold'. Quinton broke up play with tactical substations: Isaac Nkosi replaced Stevens; Liam Hope replaced Nathan Livings. Tyler Campbell (a half-time substitute for the injured Lockie) went close with a shot on the run. More Enfield chances came and went. Bobby Devyne did put the ball in the Bognor net again; but he was adjudged offside. Home celebrations were short-lived; but were on hold only briefly. "The Rocks" of Bognor Regis found themselves on the rocks, as their faint hopes of a play-off place dwindled desperately away. The home fans were merciless, though; as they began choruses of "Olé, Olé, Olé!", while the visitors struggled to win the ball back from their teasingly superior hosts. There was some head-scratching and mystified look-sharing, as Enfield's central midfielder, #6 Stanley Muguo, was announced as the man-of-the-match, over the PA. He'd been influential; but hardly central - and two-goal hero Whitely must have been less than impressed by the panel's decision. Bognor's own numbers 4, 5, 6 & 7 (Tuck, Field, Robson and Green - no, not THAT Robson & Green!) were probably also in the mix for the award, for any unbiased and neutral observer; but too many of their other players had not shown their mettle when it mattered.

"Olé, Olé, Olé!". Town play frustrating/entertaining 'keep-ball', late in the 2nd half.

Mysteriously little added time in the first half contrasted with a mysteriously-calculated five added minutes at the end of the second. When the final whistle eventually went, Enfield celebrations were near-ecstatic. There was a positive sense that Town's end-of-season momentum was growing; and that those sought-after play-offs were beckoning strongly. Whatever good might come of them! Enfield Town moved back up to 5th place; and thoughts turned towards Dulwich Hamlet: a point and two goals ahead of Town in the league table - and an obstacle in the way of deserved(?) promotion.

At the final whistle, the home crowd behind Bognor's goal can at last begin to celebrate ... nervously, optimistically, superstitiously.

But wait! Once again I hear the disturbing echoes of that cynical advice, as sung by the Duke of Mantua, in "Rigoletto" - and I surely can't be the only one who hears it. Can I? OK, so I 'got away with' coming along to Donkey Lane, without unduly disturbing Enfield's feng shui; but could I REALLY also afford to sashay along to Champion Hill on Monday, quite so comfortably and calmly? Well perhaps, if I sacrifice a sugar mouse in the road, along the way ...

Full-time: Enfield Town 2 - Bognor Regis Town 0

Nathan McDonald, Jordan Lockie (Tyler Campbell 45), Ricky Gabriel, Claudiu Vilcu, Joe Ellul, Stanley Muguo, Nathan Livings (Liam Hope 70), Ryan Doyle, Corey Whitely, Bobby Devyne, Joe Stevens (Isaac Nkosi 62). Unused subs: Dernell Wynter, Michael Kalu.

Bognor Regis Town: Chris Winterton, Snorre Nilsen (Daryl Wollers 50), James Crane, Doug Tuck (Dan Sackman 75), Chad Field, Craig Robson, Stuart Green, Jake Thomson, Jason Prior, Terry Dodd, Jack Maloney. Unused subs: Charlie Oatway, Harry Wedlake, Omarr Lawson.

Attendance: 533