Easter Play-Off Hopes Hang in the Balance

Enfield Town versus Bognor Regis Town F.C.

Ryman League Premier Division

Saturday 4th April, 2015 – 3pm kick-off

Before the day's big game ...

It's the gripping story of yet another North London side desperate to finish in the top five. After my recent 'enforced' break from match attendance, to complete some urgent home DIY, Easter Saturday sees me 'back in action', as Enfield take on the promotion-chasing "Rocks" of Bognor Regis. Nicknames can certainly be confusing at this level of The Beautiful Game, though. In two weeks time, Town will again take on the promotion-chasing "Rocks"; but that game will feature those of East Thurrock United, in the North Londoners' final away fixture of the campaign.

"Royal" Bognor's joint-manager [King George V added the suffix 'Regis' to the town's name in 1929, after which the club wore a blue and gold strip for a period in the 1930's] is Jamie Howell. He's a local lad, from Rustington; and a former wannabee professional footballer. Howell played in the football league for Torquay United (3 appearances!) and was also on the books at: Arsenal; Portsmouth; Notts County and Brighton & Hove Albion - all without troubling the playing surface in competitive performances. He represented England Youth level and captained the at Schoolboy side. Enfield fans will be hoping that he makes some of those oft-referenced, apocryphal 'schoolboy' errors, today. Bognor have, after all, been slipping in recent weeks, managing only one win in their last six games; the win being last time out, at home to the (also-fading - with just one point from the last fifteen available!) Metropolitan Police.

My absence had seemed to represent no hardship to The Towners; except, perhaps, a minor financial one? Whether today's Rocks would prove to be Sedimentary or Igneous was a moot point. Since my last report, however, it's clear that Enfield had been somewhat Metamorphic, themselves! With 5 wins from the 6 games they have played since that frustrating home capitulation to boring, boring Leiston; and with no points dropped at home since then. As a result, Enfield start the day nicely poised in 6th place; just one point behind the play-off place occupied by Grays Athletic, who have played an extra game - and with Bognor five places and four points behind them. Town's run-in to the end of the season is (relatively) kind. After a tough Bank Holiday Monday fixture, away at fellow play-off hopefuls, 'fading' Dulwich Hamlet (four defeats and a draw in their last five outings - and who were only narrow winners at Donkey Lane, back in late January) the club have 'home comforts' against two struggling sides (Hornchurch and Witham, who currently occupy 22nd and 21st positions in a league of 24 teams). Those games are separated only by a minor cup fixture and that away game against Thurrock.

The club's website is trying to 'big-up' the day's contest, noting that the visitors from the Sussex coast have recently boosted their squad with major football league talent: "The Rocks are breathing down Town's necks in the league ... They have moved to strengthen their squad recently, bringing in Jack Maloney from Sky Bet League Two side Portsmouth". A little research shows, however, that in his 10 appearances for Pompey, Maloney scored no goals. The Isle of Wight-born 20 year-old had been released by Portsmouth, after failing to "chime"! The more likely potent threat up front from the visitors will, surely, be Terry Dodd, who has scored two goals in their last two games.

The Enfield Advertiser stokes the promotion interest further, noting "the table is so tightly packed that every side down to 13th-placed Billericay Town still harbours ambitions of securing one of the two play-off places which seem to be up for grabs. Town’s fate is in their own hands though, as they know that victory in their last five games will guarantee them a play-off spot". In fact, I'd say that interest goes all the way down to Leatherhead, in 14th place. Manager Brad Quinton is well aware of the significance of the weekend's two games - and shows himself capable of adopting many a well-worn cliché: “Every match is important at this stage and we just need to take things a game at a time ... we’ve just to keep on believing in ourselves... It’s so tight up there and the key for us is to look after ourselves and not worry about what any other teams are doing... Results have shown that anyone can beat anyone in this league and I know that we can’t win them all... The support we’ve been getting has been fantastic and it would be great to see as many people as possible come along to give the guys the backing they deserve.” Sounds like an interview that could have doubled as a fascinating game of bull-sh*t bingo.

I wish I could claim, in all honesty, that the excitement here was reaching fever pitch, ahead of the game; but I already have a selection problem. Barbados-born Callum, back from University for the Easter holiday break, has advised me this morning, somewhat less than reluctantly, that he'd rather continue working on his History dissertation than risk exposure to yet another ordeal at the QEII Stadium. The impression given was that he might well also prefer to squeeze the blood from his own eyeballs. So, the early score reads:
Enfield Town F.C. 0 - John of Gaunt (Duke of Lancaster, 4th son of King Edward III of England) 1 (see also http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_of_Gaunt,_1st_Duke_of_Lancaster).

Meanwhile, Brad Quinton's only selection issue should be the likely continued absence of Captain Marvel, centre-back Mark Kirby; who continues to struggle with a metatarsal problem, A cagey game could be in prospect. Regular readers of this page may remember an earlier match report on this same fixture almost exactly a year ago (Thursday 3rd April, 2014 - 7:45pm kick-off). Then, a narrow home win eased Enfield's relegation worries. Town ended the season safely, in 19th place. While Bognor made the play-offs, where they missed out on promotion, with Lowestoft Town climbing into the Conference North. Home fans will be hoping for a Groundhog Day result, this time out, at that higher end of the table. Come on, you Towners!